Mysteries of the East

Bradford City FC 2 - 0 Rochdale AFC

Journey:

Mystery #1: As Mr. Keane had elected to desert us in favour of Ms. Bentley this weekend - consequently it fell to me to organise picking Mr. Turner up. The simple solution would have been for Mr. Turner to come to my house. Therefore, imagine my surprise when I found myself waiting for him in Rochdale's Town Hall car park. In spite of his many visits to my home - he seemed to have forgotten where I lived.

More annoying than this - he was late.

As I waited under the clock tower I realised I was caught up in the aftermath of a wedding in the registry office. It wasn't obvious to begin with - but so many orange women in such a small space did give the game away.

Therefore, when Mr. Turner's ashen features finally appeared it was quite a pleasant change. He had been out last night and was feeling somewhat indisposed.

Having made a brief stop for Mr. Turner to pick up fluids we finally got on our way. In a little over half an hour we were in Bradford. I looked at the SatNav which indicated just over a mile to go - how easy was that?

Mystery #2: 'At the roundabout, take the first left'. Sounds simple enough doesn't it? Well, there was no first left - in fact there was no roundabout. It had simply disappeared.

Herein lies the danger of completely relying on SatNav.

Round and round Bradford city centre we drove for a further fifteen minutes. Having passed the Bradford Hilton for the third time, Mr. Turner emerged briefly from beneath his hangover to suggest an alternate route. He was un-nervingly correct - he can't find my house which he has been to dozens of times - but he can find a football ground he has never been to. FatNav!

Weather:

A perfect late summer day.

Food:

In addition to Mr. Turner, I was accompanied on my journey into the Orient by Lady Luck, Young Mr. Eden-Maughan and his significant other Miss. Wolfenden. Taking family to games means one thing - you are paying. The trip through the turnstiles had already resulted in a near fatal nose bleed - but more of that later. The food counter almost initiated a terminal stroke...

Mystery #3: I provided Young Mr. Eden-Maughan with a crisp £10 note and instructions to get food for Lady Luck, himself and his lady. He returned some twenty minutes later - and handed me 40 pence change. £9.60 for three sausage rolls and three bottles of pop! Errr - well not quite. £9.60 for two sausage rolls and three bottles of pop - Lady Luck was not hungry!!! How these prices can be justified is quite beyond me.

Ground:

Mystery #4: After the huge turnout last season - I gather Rochdale have the distiction of taking the most away fans to Valley Parade last season - we were moved from the Bradford End into part of a larger adjoining stand. From my vantage point near the touch line I had a splendid view of a very strange stadium. Two fantastic, modern, two tier stands joined at the corner making a very impressive structure directly in front me.

The stand we were in was somewhat less grand but fairly servicable - despite the food prices and the fact that even allowing for the change of stand there wasn't enough room for all of the Dale faithful. ( I suspect we topped 1,000 travelling fans today - I doubt the Bantams will see this many again this season.)

The Bradford End itself looks like badly converted holiday apartments and adjoins the WWII era barracks type facillity which apparently contains the changing rooms.

'Come to Valley Parade and see half of one of the best stadium's in Britain!'

All this - plus they only lay on one turnstile - so people were still taking their seats well into the game - and - the ticket prices! £20 for an adult, £12 for a junior. Today's little outing set me back £81.60 including food. Absolutely outrageous.

Action:

Mystery #5: Rochdale started brightly, moving the ball well and creating a selection of decent chances against a fairly static and unimaginative looking Bantams line up. In spite of Bradford's terrific start to the season, Dale seemed to have more than the measure of them. It is therefore a complete mystery how Rochdale found themselves 2-0 down at half time. Bradford's only serious attack of the half resulted in Boulding scoring on twenty minutes from a Thorne cross. Fifteen minutes later some curious refereeing from Mr. Penn afforded Bradford a fortuitous free-kick which Thorne arrived on the end of to make it 2-0.

Very mysterious indeed.

As half-time unfolded we were treated to the 'Bradford City Gent' - the Bantams mascot - basically an old chap in a football strip and a bowler hat. Not a patch on the 'Mighty Mariner' - or Desmond the Dragon - or even the much maligned Spotty (who has not been seen since John Doolan left us - coincidence? you decide). A bloke with a microphone talked us through a rather complicated game which seemed to mainly rely on booting the ball into the crowd. It was only when it was all over that we were informed that the objective was to hit the bar.

As is now becoming a tradition, Playboy Dan fought his way through the milling half-time crowd to say hello.

The second half played out much as the first had. Dale pressed, Bradford parried and countered - but this time the scorer remained unemployed. 2-0 to Bradford it remained.

Summary:

Rochdale played some nice stuff today and can justly feel that the final score flattered Bradford a little.

However, they were significantly out competed in the midfield for much of the first half - Bradford's more direct and physical approach to the game paid real dividends.

In terms of pure numbers, Dale had more and better chances but just couldn't seem to put them away - Bradford had less but really made them count - aided in some measure by some slightly chaotic Dale defending.

All in all a thoroughly professional performance from Bradford. From the point they took the lead, the result never seemed seriously in doubt. All the more disappointing considering the experience had finacially beggared me...

Turner Watch:

In a week which saw some vehement demands for the end of Turner Watch - Mr. Turner justified his selection this week. Ok, he was late - and stank of ale - and couldn't remember where I live - but he did manage to get us through the warren that is Bradford city centre. Oh, and he did turn up - he did not, for example, bunk off to Preston with his Mrs.

23/08/08