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Rola Cola Sponsored English League Two

Bradford City FC 0 - 3 Rochdale AFC

Journey

McDonalds.  Somewhere in Bradford. 

If you thought sports journalism was all limo's, caviar and exotic ladies.  It isn't.  Mostly it involves several large men packed into a small car schlepping along some motorway or other, food is of the 'fast' variety and as for the ladies - that must have been going on somewhere else.  It is not in any way glamorous.  That said, from time to time, it can be absolutely brilliant - but more of that later.

So, back to McDonalds.  You might suspect that with five football journalists together and a big game in the offing - Dale could go top of the table with a win tonight - there would be a furious debate about formations, tactics and the merits of zonal vs man marking. If you did think that, you would be disappointed.  The discussion was actually about 'The Worst Dale Player's Ever'.  This is a pretty fertile area for discussion - as you can appreciate. 

Richard Green - signed-on, got injured, never actually played.

Simon Coleman - the architect of Dale's 7-1 hammering by Shrewsbury in 2001.

Tommy Jasczun - where to begin on this one?

Warren Goodhind - had his own section in most referee's notebook.

There were plenty more besides - plenty more.   Graham Lancashire was briefly considered - but despite only playing 1 game in 4 due to an eye sprain or similar -  he was excluded because when he did play he was actually quite good and a bit of a character. 

The undisputed winner - by miles - no dissenting voices on this one - was Michael Simpkins.  A left back by trade (although trading standards may have a word or two to say about that), this man gave each and every one of us hope that our naive dreams of a career as a  professional football may not be quite dead.  He spent much of his time at Dale enjoying an early bath, creating goals for the opposition by never being quite where he was meant to be or offering Dale fans 'out in the carpark' for questioning his ability (this was during a game).  The most amazing thing is - he is still playing, for Retford Town.  Michael Simpkins - we salute you.   

With burgers consumed and after a brief delay for Mr. Jones to finish his complimentary 'student' McFlurry - we squeezed back into Mr. Culshaw's car and headed for Valley Parade.

Weather

Winter really arrived today.  A heavy frost this morning and frigid temperatures for the rest of the day.  As Messers Ashworth, Culshaw, Jones and Sharples assembled at the club shop - you would be forgiven for thinking that the Wombles had reformed.  Sweaters, cardy's, big coats, scarves, gloves and hats were heavily in evidence.  Snow was a distinct possibility. 

But as is the way of things - we had all got it wrong.  An oilskin and a souwester would have been more appropriate - it absolutely tipped it down.

Food

Not meat and potatoe pie tonight - cherry bakewell's.  There was loads in the press room - and doughnuts and french fancies.  I made a bit of a pig of myself.  The best part was that having cleared the plates - a nice lady called Margaret popped out from behind her counter and layed out more.  To be honest It was a mercy when the game got started.

Ground 

It will be brilliant when it's finished. 

Half of the ground is propper Premier League quality - the other half kind of isn't.  That said, with 11,000 home fans cheering the Bantams on you got some sense of the glory days at Valley Parade - when Man U and co were regular guests.  Tucked away in a corner were about 700 Dale fans - they gave it their best - but being outnumbered better than 10-1 - they struggled to make themselves heard.

News

Revolving doors.  Keltie returned from Chester and Shaw returned from Barrow, unfortunately due to the new revolving doors which have been installed at Spotland - they were ejected in the general direction of Gateshead.

Hokey Cokey #2.  After a handfull of brief and slightly forgettable outings for Scot Spencer and Marcus Manga on non-contract terms, they were both extended the opportunity to be elsewhere.  Everyone at May Contain Football wishes them luck in their future endeavours.  In their stead, Vale Park fan favourite Danny Glover (no, not that one) has joined Dale on a one month loan.

It's Back.  Keith Hill has once again been nominated for the 'looks like a soft drink bottle - but in silver' award - sometimes known as the League Two manager of the month award for November.

Action

Your team for tonight:

GK: Heaton

Def: Wiseman, Stanton, Dawson, Kennedy(T)

Mid: Thompson, Taylor, Kennedy(J), Atkinson

For: Dagnall, O'Grady

Bench: Taberner, McArdle, Flynn, Hogan, Toner, Jones, Glover

Just two changes from the side which saw off Notts County last week.  Kennedy returned from suspension and slotted in at left full back and Thompson replaced the once again injured Buckley.

As the rain rolled in over an already boggy Valley Parade pitch Dale steeled themselves for a potentially tough game.  Bradford had swept a timorous Dale team aside in this fixture last season and shown themselves to be no stranger to the physical aspects of the game in the return tie - although Dale won handsomely.  Add to that Rochdale's habit of getting a nose bleed when chances to top the division have presented themselves before and you will understand why Dale's recent good form was far from my mind as Mr. Foster got things started.

It started very evenly.  Evans for Bradford getting into good positions and enjoying good service from Dale old boy Simon Ramsden playing in a unfamilliar wing-back role.  Rochdale would have early chances through Dagnall.  A touch to many from Daggers saw a shot blocked out by the Bantams defence and minutes later Dagnall appeared to have the goal at his mercy when the ball unexpectedly disappeared down a divot in the sodden 18 yard box - leaving Dagnall five yards ahead of the ball and somewhat non-plussed.

For all of Bradford's tidy forward play - their defence looked distinctly shaky - typified by Dagnall's next chance.  A poor clearance from Williams fell to the feet of Dagnall just inside the Bantam's half, a burst of pace undid Rehman and Dagnall's scuffed shot flew through Eastwood's legs and into the back of the net.  1-0 Dale!

Minutes later Reham found himself outmuscled by Dagnall - and spotting Eastwood off his line the Dale striker tried a dipping long range shot - but with the keeper beaten his effort went well over.

In case you were wondering - Chris Dagnall wasn't the only man on the pitch - it just seemed that way.  With the half hour approaching he was in the think of it again.  O'Grady's cross found him almost unmarked in the area.  Eastwood paried his first strike - but only back into the prowling strikers path - Dagnall's improvised finish bounced over the sprawling Eastwood and into the unguarded goal.  2-0 Dale!

In what seemed like a heartbeat Joe Thompson had the ball in the net - but a questionable off-side decision spared Bradford further blushes.  The half played out with further efforts from Dagnall, another from Thompson and O'Grady and Atkinson also went close.  But for Eastwood's gymnastics - the Bantam's could have been in a world of trouble.  Heaton had barely had a save to make all half.

As I bounded into the press room at half time a Bradford official commented that it was like watching a cup tie - against a team from a higher division. 

This was all going rather splendidly - Bournemouth were losing to Barnet meaning that Dale would be top tonight provided the Cherries didn't turn things around.  I toddled off in search of Margaret and her cake tin a very happy man indeed.

Bradford elected to retire Zesh Rehman from the action at the start of the second period - replacing him with Bateson.  The change seemed to make a difference.  Bradford poured forward at every opportunity assisted by a powerful gale at their backs and the words of a furious Stuart McColl no doubt ringing in their ears - the first ten minutes of the half were played almost exclusively on the fringes of Dale's penalty area.  Despite the pressure - not a single serious effort materialised for the Bantams. 

With the hour mark approaching Higginbotham - who had replaced a limping Thompson - picked up the ball on the right and released Dagnall with a neat pass.  Dagnall rounded the last defender - but his shot was well blocked away by Eastwood.  Sadly for Eastwood - only as far as O'Grady.  At full stretch the on-loan Oldham man lashed the ball past the stranded keeper.  3-0 Dale!

Bradford head's dropped.  Dagnall and Higginbotham could have extended the lead still further - Higginbotham going closest when one on one with Eastwood, but his shot squirmed wide of the post.

Mr. Foster finally saw fit to bring matters to a close.  The Bradford fans - who, in spite of the performance, had been 100% behind their team throughout the game - began to drift away with thoughts of a takeaway supper in mind.  But over in a corner of one stand no-one was moving.  700 people were on the feet - once I removed my headphones, I understood why - the ground of Yorkshire was shaking to this charming old hymn:

WE ARE TOP OF THE LEAGUE! SAID WE ARE TOP OF THE LEAGUE!  WE ARE TOP OF THE LEAGUE! SAID WE ARE TOP OF THE LEAGUE! WE ARE TOP OF THE LEAGUE! SAID WE ARE TOP OF THE LEAGUE!

For the first time in eight years, it's really happened. 

Speak Your Brains

Your cast for tonight: Mr. Culshaw, Mr Ashworth, Mr. Sharples, Mr. Jones and myself.

We discovered a slight flaw in the admittedly handsome main stand at Valley Parade.  It has no end on it - meaning that the rain blows straight in.  Mr. Culshaw spent much of the game shielding the broadcasting gear and I spent most of the game shielding Mr. Culshaw.  As I said, not glamorous.

Dagnall was absolutely awesome tonight - but praise also goes to Jason Taylor who seems to have found his feet in the side and bossed the midfield for Dale tonight.  The oft maligned Joe Thompson was also worthy of praise - the Bantam's left back didn't know whether he was coming or going for much of the game.

Bournemouth managed a draw in the end - meaning Dale top the table by one point.  OK, there are 27 games to go - and a lot will happen betwen now and May - but until Saturday at the very least, Rochdale AFC are top of League Two. 

We agreed on celebratory kebabs when we got home - apparently when kebabs are eaten in celebration they are completely calorie free.  The god news just keeps on coming.

Mysteries of the East

Bradford City FC 2 - 0 Rochdale AFC

Journey:

Mystery #1: As Mr. Keane had elected to desert us in favour of Ms. Bentley this weekend - consequently it fell to me to organise picking Mr. Turner up. The simple solution would have been for Mr. Turner to come to my house. Therefore, imagine my surprise when I found myself waiting for him in Rochdale's Town Hall car park. In spite of his many visits to my home - he seemed to have forgotten where I lived.

More annoying than this - he was late.

As I waited under the clock tower I realised I was caught up in the aftermath of a wedding in the registry office. It wasn't obvious to begin with - but so many orange women in such a small space did give the game away.

Therefore, when Mr. Turner's ashen features finally appeared it was quite a pleasant change. He had been out last night and was feeling somewhat indisposed.

Having made a brief stop for Mr. Turner to pick up fluids we finally got on our way. In a little over half an hour we were in Bradford. I looked at the SatNav which indicated just over a mile to go - how easy was that?

Mystery #2: 'At the roundabout, take the first left'. Sounds simple enough doesn't it? Well, there was no first left - in fact there was no roundabout. It had simply disappeared.

Herein lies the danger of completely relying on SatNav.

Round and round Bradford city centre we drove for a further fifteen minutes. Having passed the Bradford Hilton for the third time, Mr. Turner emerged briefly from beneath his hangover to suggest an alternate route. He was un-nervingly correct - he can't find my house which he has been to dozens of times - but he can find a football ground he has never been to. FatNav!

Weather:

A perfect late summer day.

Food:

In addition to Mr. Turner, I was accompanied on my journey into the Orient by Lady Luck, Young Mr. Eden-Maughan and his significant other Miss. Wolfenden. Taking family to games means one thing - you are paying. The trip through the turnstiles had already resulted in a near fatal nose bleed - but more of that later. The food counter almost initiated a terminal stroke...

Mystery #3: I provided Young Mr. Eden-Maughan with a crisp £10 note and instructions to get food for Lady Luck, himself and his lady. He returned some twenty minutes later - and handed me 40 pence change. £9.60 for three sausage rolls and three bottles of pop! Errr - well not quite. £9.60 for two sausage rolls and three bottles of pop - Lady Luck was not hungry!!! How these prices can be justified is quite beyond me.

Ground:

Mystery #4: After the huge turnout last season - I gather Rochdale have the distiction of taking the most away fans to Valley Parade last season - we were moved from the Bradford End into part of a larger adjoining stand. From my vantage point near the touch line I had a splendid view of a very strange stadium. Two fantastic, modern, two tier stands joined at the corner making a very impressive structure directly in front me.

The stand we were in was somewhat less grand but fairly servicable - despite the food prices and the fact that even allowing for the change of stand there wasn't enough room for all of the Dale faithful. ( I suspect we topped 1,000 travelling fans today - I doubt the Bantams will see this many again this season.)

The Bradford End itself looks like badly converted holiday apartments and adjoins the WWII era barracks type facillity which apparently contains the changing rooms.

'Come to Valley Parade and see half of one of the best stadium's in Britain!'

All this - plus they only lay on one turnstile - so people were still taking their seats well into the game - and - the ticket prices! £20 for an adult, £12 for a junior. Today's little outing set me back £81.60 including food. Absolutely outrageous.

Action:

Mystery #5: Rochdale started brightly, moving the ball well and creating a selection of decent chances against a fairly static and unimaginative looking Bantams line up. In spite of Bradford's terrific start to the season, Dale seemed to have more than the measure of them. It is therefore a complete mystery how Rochdale found themselves 2-0 down at half time. Bradford's only serious attack of the half resulted in Boulding scoring on twenty minutes from a Thorne cross. Fifteen minutes later some curious refereeing from Mr. Penn afforded Bradford a fortuitous free-kick which Thorne arrived on the end of to make it 2-0.

Very mysterious indeed.

As half-time unfolded we were treated to the 'Bradford City Gent' - the Bantams mascot - basically an old chap in a football strip and a bowler hat. Not a patch on the 'Mighty Mariner' - or Desmond the Dragon - or even the much maligned Spotty (who has not been seen since John Doolan left us - coincidence? you decide). A bloke with a microphone talked us through a rather complicated game which seemed to mainly rely on booting the ball into the crowd. It was only when it was all over that we were informed that the objective was to hit the bar.

As is now becoming a tradition, Playboy Dan fought his way through the milling half-time crowd to say hello.

The second half played out much as the first had. Dale pressed, Bradford parried and countered - but this time the scorer remained unemployed. 2-0 to Bradford it remained.

Summary:

Rochdale played some nice stuff today and can justly feel that the final score flattered Bradford a little.

However, they were significantly out competed in the midfield for much of the first half - Bradford's more direct and physical approach to the game paid real dividends.

In terms of pure numbers, Dale had more and better chances but just couldn't seem to put them away - Bradford had less but really made them count - aided in some measure by some slightly chaotic Dale defending.

All in all a thoroughly professional performance from Bradford. From the point they took the lead, the result never seemed seriously in doubt. All the more disappointing considering the experience had finacially beggared me...

Turner Watch:

In a week which saw some vehement demands for the end of Turner Watch - Mr. Turner justified his selection this week. Ok, he was late - and stank of ale - and couldn't remember where I live - but he did manage to get us through the warren that is Bradford city centre. Oh, and he did turn up - he did not, for example, bunk off to Preston with his Mrs.

23/08/08