Bye, bye monkey

Rola-Cola Sposored English League Two

Lincoln City FC 1 - 3 Rochdale AFC

Journey

I have a serious problem.  I have a monkey on my back.  It has been there for over ten years.  It is called Lincoln.

Through bad luck, work and an ill-starred flirtation with golf I have never seen Rochdale win against Lincoln.  Never.  I have seen lots of draws and a number of narrow defeats -  I was lucky enough to miss the 7-1 demolition of Dale at Sincil Bank in 2006.  Lincoln City Football Club are the monkey on my back... and I am not alone.  Mr. Keane has exactly the same problem - although he had the good sense not to bother with golf.  In fairness, he did try to warn me.

I hadn't planned to go to Lincoln - based on the history, what was the point? - in any case, I went last year (another draw).  But then Bradford happened - and then Macclesfield - and after a quick glance down the league table I made my mind up.  I was going.  I suspect Mr. Keane was thinking along similar lines - after a phone call on Thursday - he was in as well.

...and so it was the Mr. Keane, Keane Jnr (six weeks without a game for the Littleborough Yellow's due to sodden pitches) and myself set forth for Lincolnshire at 11.30.

With Mr. Keane's Sat Nav, Mary, leading the way and Mr. Keane conducting a scientific study into the performance and handling characteristics of a hire car (the HMS Zafira had been subject to an unfortunate collision) - coversation turned to the other monkey on our back's.  January.

Allow me to un-roll for you a selection of fibs, outright lies, speculations and newspaper gabble - with commentary:

Oldham will not extend O'Grady's loan.  Having realised that COG is not the beast of burden they had widely quoted him as - Latics ask Rochdale to reach for your cheque book!

Tom Kennedy unhappy at Dale - wants to move.  Bury fan's still smarting over 'that' goal celebration.

Dagnall to Norwich - Whaley plus cash in return.  Whilst out with Keith Hill and Dave Flitcroft last week - Simon said 'no comment' to our roving reporter.

Buckley to Hull - Atkinson plus cash in return.  I can't spot the difference - and big dobs of Premiership cash as well - super!

Dawson to Tottenham. Not if his mum has anything to do with it - it's full of 'funny' folk that London is.

Buckley to Coventry - A Specials gig at Spotland and cash in return.  Where do we sign!?!

In short - nonsense.  Something will happen - goodness knows what.  This monkey will cling on for a while.

We arrived in Lincoln, Mary went mad, we drove round in circles for a bit, parked up, walked round in circles for a bit and then found Sincil Bank - hiding behind some houses.

Weather

Clear skies and arctic temperatures.

Food

Having massively 'over-pied' last week - nothing.  Free coffee at half time for the press though - Spotland take note.

Ground

Tidy.  The Lincoln Echo stand is a bit of a funny one though - straddling the halfway line, it is only half the length of that side - so there are two much smaller stands snuggled up next to it.  Considering the biting cold - probably not a bad idea.

What was warming however, was the sight of 500 Dale fans - including a platoon of festive Santa's.

Actually getting to the commentary positions was a bit of a trial - I had to collect my ticket from one end of the ground - and then walk to the other end to get in.  All a bit odd.  I finally caught up with Mr. Culshaw and was ushered to my thoughtfully prepared seat.  After Bradford where I was used as a storm barrier - today I would be acting as a sun visor for my illustrious colleague

News

Black and white and red all over.  Notts County have been sold - again.  You coldn't make it up.

Beat the bullet.  Keith Hill avoided the acursed manager of the month award.  Ronnie Moore at Rotherfield swept up the silvery cola bottle.  Best of luck with that Ronnie.

Action

Your team for today:

GK: Heaton

Def: Kennedy(T), Stanton, Dawson, Wiseman

Mid: Atkinson, Taylor, Kennedy(J), Thompson

For: Dagnall, O'Grady

Bench: Taberner, McArdle, Flynn, Toner, Jones, Glover, Higginbotham

Just one change, Thompson in for Higginbotham.  With a settled Dale side rolling into the game on the back of four straight wins, the chilling sound of an air-raid siren thundering around Sincil Bank and the mercury plummeting in the thermometer - was today finally going to be the day?  Would Mr. Keane and I finally shed the monkey?

It didn't look good to start with.  Lincoln had clearly paid heed to Burton and Accrington's performances against Dale - and sought to crowd and stifle Rochdale at every turn.  Dale had more of the ball - but against a resolute Imp's line-up - few real opportunities presented themselves.

On 23 minutes, it looked a lot worse.  A Rochdale corner came to nothing and Lichaj picked up the clearance.  With the Dale defence scattered and disorganised the young American carved his way upfield - running almost box to box.  With Rochdale's defenders drawn to the Aston Villa loanee he realeased a millimeter perfect pass into the path of fellow Villa loanee Chris Herd.  With the defence wrong footed Herd only had Heaton to deal with - a clinical strike left the Dale keeper with no chance.  1-0 Lincoln.

Thirteen minutes later Dale were level.  Tenacious work from Atkinson released Wiseman who bucaneered forward before swinging a pacy cross into the box where O'Grady lept on the gift and smashed the ball past Rob Burch from the edge of the six yard box.  1-1!

As halftime drew close it seemed that Thompson's cute looping header from just inside the area had caught Burch off his line and pushed Dale into the lead - but frantic back pedalling by the Lincoln keeper allowed him to tip the ball over.  But it was a corner for Dale.  Tom Kennedy floated the ball in - Dawson romped into the area - his bullet header left Burch powerless to intervene.  2-1 Dale!

Halftime put in it's customary appearance and as the assembled press attempted to keep warm the talk was about events elsewhere.  Everton were putting up a spirited fight against Chelsea,  Bolton were giving City a run for their (not inconsiderable) money and Bradford were making Rotherfield's afternoon less than comfortable - but the big news was second place Bournemouth.  At halftime thery were already 3-0 down at Morecambe.  At this rate - Dale could be four points clear at the end of today.

On the subject of monkeys - you may recall at Bradford we voted Michael Simpkins as Dale's worst ever player.  Truly a monkey on Dale's back if ever there was one.  We also revealed that he is still playing - for Retford United.  Retford is just down the road from Lincoln - we passed it today.  But the coincidences didn't end there - in the last couple of weeks Roch Valley Radio have added a correspondant at FC United games to the coverage of Rochdale and Bury matches - today FC United's opponents were Retford United - and yes - Simpkins was playing.  Apparently he was quite good.  Retford were leading by halftime.

The second half began under a blood red sunset - but despite the dramatic backdrop the second period was something of a non-event.  Dale kept the ball quite nicely, Lincoln harried - but with less conviction than at the start of the first half and then, just on the hour Dale got a third.

A nicely choreographed free kick saw Tom Kennedy slide the ball wide to Dagnall.  As the wall tried to work out what was happening, Dagnall crossed to the back post where Thompson had the simple task of tapping the ball over the line.  3-1!

For the remaining half hour Dale made pretty triangle's around the slightly disinterested Imp's.  Lincoln threatened little and rarely.  As the clock ran down and the mercury sank even lower Chris O'Grady teed up an effort from twenty yards which looked to have Burch beaten - but it hammered off the bar and bounced away to safety.

Speak Your Brains

Your cast for today: Mr. Keane, Keane Jnr and myself

In the end Bournemouth were on the wrong end of a 5-0 rout.  Dale are four points clear at the top of League Two.

Retford United beat FC United 4-2.  Michael Simpkins had a good game.

Today marks a club record five consecutive away wins for Dale.

At the end of some exhaustive testing by Mr. Keane - I can confirm that a hire car is the fastest best handling car in the world.  Fact.

During the somewhat event free second half, Mr. Culshaw made a heart stoppingly exciting point:  Whatever happens next Saturday - Dale will be top of League Two on Christmas day.  I don't think this has ever happened before.

Mr. Keane and I saw Rochdale beat Lincoln.  Bye, bye monkey.