Is this the way to Pamplona?

Rochdale AFC 2 - 4 Hereford United

Journey:

Late! A combination of errands and generally poor planning on my part meant that I arrived ten minutes into the game. I can't even blame the roundabout at Sudden. As I double-timed it up to Spotland I heard a mighty roar - imagine my delight when I trotted through the turnstiles to find that we were 1-0 up!
  

Food:

Due to my late arrival I plumped for a diet coke and strode on to my spot. For reasons which will become clear I was soon back at the Spotland Patisserie to partake of the classic two pie formation - Mr Keane opted for the controversial pie & cheeseburger system - Mr Mitchel kept his own cousel on his gastronomic selections. I ventured back rather later for a coffee - I note that we are still using the outflow from Sellafield for hot drinks and as my cup was roughly as watertight as a hairnet - this was a pressing concern.

I read with interest during the week that Rochdale are seeking a corporate sponsor for Spotland Stadium in order to drum up some more ackers. No interested parties have emerged yet - but it is interesting to speculate on the Microsoft, MacDonalds or Coca Cola Spotland Bowl. Although it is far more likely that we will soon be standing in the Hollands Pie-Dish...

Weather:

A velvet black night, cool and crisp - spotlights blazing at Spotland so that God could watch as well...

Away Support:

Fifty - if that. I am sure they are glad they made the trip.

Action:

As I had mentioned earlier, Dale were one up on seven minutes thanks to Simon Ramsden. It seemed that the defeats by the Posh and the Imps were distant memories.

However, in a week dominated by talk of Premiership games being played in New York, Seol, Dubai, Hong Kong or Sydney - considering what happened next - I really wish I had been in any one of those places.

For the majority of the first half I was subjected to Mr Keane's seemingly un-ending 'wingers' theory. Essentially Dale's recent woes have been the result of a lack of width. He contends with a fair degree of vehemence that Le Fondre's lack of goals is down to the fact that Alfie is acting as one of the missing wingers. This is a very interesting theory - and is based on fairly solid fact. However, when I asked Mr Keane to desist and watch the football - he launched into a stream of insults directed at my hat. Harsh. I thought.

Regretably, during this cheery interval Hereford smashed through Dale's defences like a herd of their namesake bovines. As the next fifteen minutes unfolded - it happened again - and then again. In each case Sherjill MacDonald did the damage for the Bulls. In each case Dale's defence seemed to have completely forgotten where he was or as the half unfolded - what he had just done. 3-1 down at half time - dismal!

As the Vegas-style splendour of 'Golden Gamble' unfolded at half time I took a moment to reflect on Dale's mascots. Stragely, this season Dale have two - the traditional dragon, 'Desmond' and a rather well fed dalmatian dog - whose name escapes me. As I watched these two furry ambassadors of the club caper with the kiddies - I was left to wonder what process had delivered us these mascots. Dragons are not especially thick on the ground in the Rochdale borough - there isn't even one on the town shield. Why a dragon? Furthermore, why a dalmation? Sure, Dale have switched to a black and white kit this year - but it is stripes. Not polka dots! Then it dawned on me. Mascots are usually based on something people readily associate with the town. So far as I am aware few costumiers in North Manchester do either a mini-cab or a doner kebab outfit in plush material. Dog and Dragon must have been all that was left in the shop.

After the mis-adventures of the first half Dale came out for the second half on a mission. The last time I saw the Dale formation employed in the second half - I was at primary school. Sam Russell was playing 'rush' goalie - everyone else was up front.

Dale assembled many good chances as the half wore on and Hereford looked fairly stretched at times. Sadly for Dale none of these opportunities could be converted; with the luxury of a two goal lead the Bulls could happily sit back and soak up the pressure.

Dale's gung-ho approach to the second half finally back-fired on 73 minutes when Hooper broke clear of Dale's threadbare defence and lobbed Russell to make it 4-1.

Rene Howe grabbed a late consolation goal for Dale on 90 minutes making it 4-2. Very little, very late indeed.

Summary:

Dale started well and then simply dozed off for 15 minutes - during which time Hereford ran riot. It really was unforgivable that Hereford's MacDonald was afforded so much time and space. He left the field on 81 minutes to hysterical (and possibly ironic) cheering from the Dale fans. I can't and won't criticize the cavalier approach to the second half - what else could you do? On so many occaisions Mr Hill's decision could have paid off. Unfortunately, when the goal came it was just too late to make any difference.

This was a rotten night - I am glad it is over.

Turner Watch:

This is a new feature - brought to you on the basis of a ground swell of public requests for more information about Mr Turners doings during the course of a game (how his mum got my phone number I will never know).

As a humble public service provider - who am I to poo-poo the wants and needs of the great British public. Please read on:

Mr. Turner was not at the game tonight - I have no idea where he was or what he was doing.

12/02/08